I’m a Lifelong DIYer, and the Best Thing I Ever Learned Was When to Walk Away

As a young, first-time homeowner, I was determined to learn how to fix everything myself. I didn’t have much money, but I had lots of confidence, a burgeoning tool collection and an internet connection. Armed with these things, I boldly took on any repair or remodeling project, believing only fools called in a professional.

I was convinced that if you worked harder, watched enough videos and bought the right tools, you could fix anything yourself. It took one long, misguided plumbing job to realize that the most valuable DIY skill wasn’t knowing how to use every tool, but knowing when to put them down too.

In Over My Head

My first home was a hundred-year-old, two-family property. During a remodel, I planned to replace the water lines to our tenant’s second-floor bathroom while the walls were open. It was an extensive project, but I’d recently taught myself how to solder copper pipes, so I figured I could handle it. I relished the challenge, and money was tight, so doing it myself felt like the best option.

The job went smoothly, but by late afternoon, I still wasn’t finished. The tenant didn’t have a working bathroom, so I skipped dinner and pressed on, feeling more desperate by the minute. I had one last connection to solder, but for some reason, it just wouldn’t take. Frantic, I kept applying the torch over and over again to no avail. At 8 p.m., the tenant took pity on me and went to stay at a friend’s house so I could finish the job the next morning. Exhausted and defeated, I finally stopped for the day.

The next morning, a friend who was an experienced maintenance professional came over and soldered the last joint in minutes. He kindly pointed out that my critical mistake was failing to clean the pipes well before soldering. He also noted that I was lucky I hadn’t burned the house down using the torch as long as I had.

Learning My Limits

That plumbing misadventure taught me that most things take longer than you think and working when tired, hungry and stressed rarely ends well. I should have also realized that sometimes it’s better to hire a pro, but that would take me years to embrace.

With enough experience, I did eventually learn that pushing through a project in which I was woefully over my head was not only stressful, but a poor use of my time. Sometimes the most skilled choice was to stop and pick up the phone instead.

Running a handyman business also reinforced this lesson. Working in other people’s homes, I began listening to a feeling of unease I’d get when presented with certain jobs. Instead of pushing past it, I came to see it as a valuable warning sign that this was not the job for me. Being comfortable passing on a job became my superpower. I no longer believed I had to know how to do everything, so I could focus on what I did well.

In my own home, I now have the financial freedom to hire professionals for work that’s outside my wheelhouse or simply not worth my time. I no longer touch plumbing or electrical work. I know that hardscaping jobs are more labor-intensive than I like and that I hate hanging drywall on ceilings. These are jobs I gladly hire out to pros without a shred of regret. At this point in my life, good judgment is more valuable than being able to do every project myself.

Setting Yourself Up For Success

For the projects I do take on these days, I plan and prepare differently. Here’s how:

• Allow for extra time: Always start a project in the morning to allow time for the unexpected.
• Don’t rush to buy tools: Determine if the cost makes sense and consider renting or borrowing a tool for a one-off job.
• Consider the true cost: Sure you could do the job, but is it a good use of your time? Would hiring a pro make more sense?
• Take care of yourself: Eat, drink and take breaks.
• Stop and clean as you go: Fewer mistakes are made in a clean workspace.
• Evaluate first: Before opening up a wall or driving a screw, determine what is likely behind the surface. Plumbing and electrical wires can quickly complicate a simple project.
• Know when it’s time to quit: If you’re feeling frantic or making silly mistakes, stop and clean up for the day or at least take a break.

Working Smarter, Not Harder

I now think very carefully before tackling any new home projects. I picture the whole job from start to finish and ask myself: Do I have the time, skills and tools it will take to get it done? If not, do I want to learn how, or would it be a better use of my time to hire a pro? When I do tackle a project, I recognize the signs that it’s time to take a break — and I do. I’ve gained a lot of skills over the years, but knowing how to stop has proved to be the most valuable.

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