Host kicks out brother and his 4 and 6-year-olds after the kids destroy the home office and garden, and the parents refuse to enforce any consequences for their children’s behavior

4 months ago 32

Want Your Business Featured Here?

Get instant exposure to our readers

Chat on WhatsApp
  • Two young children sit at a desk using a desktop computer, with one child typing on a keyboard while both watch the screen closely in a bright home interior with window blinds and natural light.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITJ for kicking my brother and his kids out after his son destroyed my home office and he refused to do anything about it

    So my younger brother and his wife and their two kids came to stay with us for about a week.

  • What makes it a sitcom gone wrong is the parents’ approach to discipline. They do not yell they do not enforce boundaries they just sit the kid down and ask what feelings led to that choice. It sounds like something you hear in a therapy novella not an actual parenting plan.  

  • We dont live close to each other so this was supposed to be a nice visit.

  • Quality time and all that. I was actually really looking forward to it. His kids are 4 and 6.

  • And apparently my brother and his wife have this parenting approach where they dont do any kind of punishment or consequences.

  • Like none. If the kid does something wrong they just ask them how theyre feeling and what emotions led to that choice.

  • children sit at a wooden dining table using laptops together, smiling and laughing while looking at screens in a cozy home kitchen setting with chairs, kitchen counters, and household items in the background.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Thats it. Thats the whole thing. I thought it was kinda weird when he explained it but I kept my mouth shut because its not my house its not my kids whatever.

  • Then I saw it in action The first day his daughter got into my home office and spilled juice all over my desk.

  • Got on papers, got on my keyboard, got everywhere. Nobody said anything to her. His son went into our backyard and ripped out a bunch of herbs my wife had been growing for months.

  • Just yanked them out of the ground for fun. Then he threw his toy truck at our sliding glass door hard enough to chip it.

  • And the worst part. Both kids kept messing with our cat. Pulling her tail, chasing her around, cornering her.

  • Then the kids start treating the house like a daycare with no supervisors. The daughter spills juice all over the desk soaked papers dried sugar on the keyboard. The son goes outside and treats the garden like a demolition project piling up a neat little heap of herbs that took months to grow. The sliding glass door gets chipped thanks to a toy truck fired at full speed. The cat is cornered tail‑yanked chased around like a living stress ball. Every time the host looks at the brother expecting him to say something it is just emotional archaeology instead of basic control.  

  • Our cat is old and chill and never scratched them but she was clearly stressed out and hiding under furniture.

  • Every single time I looked at my brother expecting him to step in. Nothing. His wife would crouch down and go hey buddy what feelings are you having right now that made you want to do that.

  • And the kid would shrug and run off and do something else destructive five minutes later.

  • By day two the host is sick of watching destruction get greeted with group therapy. The cat is hiding furniture is stained glass is chipped garden is ruined and the brother is lecturing about feelings instead of consequences. The moment the host finally lays down a rule about the office and the cat the brother flips and says it is not his place to parent. That is the line where niceness turns into a practical eviction.  

  • By day two I couldnt take it anymore. I told the kids firmly to stop messing with the cat and to stay out of my office.

  • My brother got in my face about it and said its not my place to parent his children.

  • I told him somebody has to because clearly nobody else is doing it. It got heated fast.

  • The choice is obvious. The house is a rental not a lab for experimental parenting. The host gives them a simple ultimatum leave tonight in a hotel or drive home. The brother calls it controlling and says they are choosing furniture over family.  

  • I told him his kids are destroying my home and hes just standing there asking about feelings while my wifes garden is torn up and my office smells like apple juice.

  • He said I was being dramatic and disrespectful of their parenting choices. I told him this whole no consequences thing is going to blow up in his face someday and his kids. are going to have a miserable time in the real world if they never learn that actions have consequences.

  • He completely shut down after that. My wife and I told them they needed to leave.

  • Find a hotel or drive home but they couldnt stay here anymore. He called me controlling and said I was choosing furniture over family.

  • Of course they are not wrong here. They are just the person who finally said that some boundaries are not about being cold they are about basic sanity.

  • AITJ?

  • Aggressive-Laugh6636 Nah asking a 4 year old what feelings made them chip your glass door is absolutely sending me like what kind of therapeutic breakthrough are they expecting from a preschooler

  • Important-Carob-4508 Original Poster's Reply dude I wish I was exaggerating but thats literally word for word what happened every single time and the kid would just shrug and go do something else five minutes later like it was groundhog day

  • PromotionUpset6530 if your parenting style requires everyone around you to suffer silently, it's a bad parenting style.

  • Ozdiva This type of parenting will not end well. Kids push against boundaries but they do need them to thrive.

  • Cynthia_McMillan Man I feel for you. Your brother needs to understand there's a difference between gentle parenting and just letting your kids run wild. Asking about feelings is fine but they still need boundaries and consequences.

  • " We do not say NO to the kid here!" so the kid pulled everyone\'s hair, threw cutlery on the floor and so on. After I had left the job I heard, that she sat on a laptop and peed on it. Absolutely not the jerk!!!!

  • FlowFluffy2711 Anyone calling you controlling here is ignoring that kids were literally destroying property.

  • sedexyn The breakthrough is realizing the only "feeling" involved is the parent's feeling of being a complete pushover

  • allthecircusponies Al/Karma Farm A few days ago you were a wife whose husband wouldn't help with your child, but instead would be doing music remixing for 10 hrs. Now you're A childless husband?

  • Medical-Potato 5920 Asking their feelings is okay if you tell them they can't do it. It's not telling them that it's wrong and issuing some kind of consequences that is shitty parenting.

  • veliquer They're hoping for a breakthrough like "I have unresolved feelings about transparency and fragility" Kid's just thinking "hehe, truck go smash"

Tags

Scroll Down For The Next Article

Read Entire Article
Chatroom