Entitled cousin offers to do bride's and bridesmaids' hair and makeup for a ‘mates rate‘, ends up taking bride's honeymoon suite and upending all wedding plans: ‘I don't want her at any parties or events I throw from now on’

3 months ago 34

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  • A woman touches up a bride's makeup before she walks down the aisle.

    A woman touches up a bride's makeup before she walks down the aisle.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • "AITAH for not wanting to associate with my cousin after the stunt she pulled at my wedding?"

    My husband (38M) and I (36F) got married a year and an half ago in a beautiful late spring wedding.

  • We don't have much in the way of finances, so it was a small intimate affair with only 50 guests.

  • Both families were great at chipping in but my mum and aunt put in the most.

  • My cousin (30F) offered to do my make up and hair, and my bridesmaids (there were 4), at 'mates rates' - I was very grateful and thought it was really kind, so took her up on it.

  • The first issues arose a couple of months before the wedding. At a family party cousin says she has no childcare, baring in mind we specifically said this would be a child-free wedding on the invites (this was purely due to cost as both sides of the family have a LOT of children, so it would have meant ditching adults we wanted there and we decided against that).

  • I found it a touch frustrating as plenty of notice was given - but I had to make a choice as it would have meant having to find someone else to do hair and make up for everyone at late notice.

  • My husband and I discussed it and agreed if she could pay for them herself she could bring them it had to be this - way as WWIII would have broken out if it had been seen as "favourites" being played she understood this - and agreed to take it off the price of the hair and make up she was doing.

  • Anyway, that was one drama over - she then needed a room, the only room big enough for her whole family was a honeymoon suite, so we also gave that up.

  • A woman in a luxe hotel robe lounges in a honeymoon suite.

    A woman in a luxe hotel robe lounges in a honeymoon suite.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Not a huge issue, we had a very nice executive suite, so still something special. Everything was set, everyone was happy...

  • This would've been the end of most brides' ropes. The very fact that the cousin was comfortable taking the honeymoon suite, reserved for the bride and her groom, tells us all we need to know. Red flag number one, if you will. The bride can overlook childcare oversight, as that's out of the cousin's control. But the suite-stealing? I'm surprised that no one decided to tell the bride she's out of her mind! But even still, this isn't the bride's fault… She thought she was doing what was needed for family.

  • then on the day of the wedding, whilst doing my make up my cousins says they can't stay any longer for x, y and z reason - thats fine, you do you, it's my wedding day I do not need drama!

  • I simply said "that's fine, but you'll need to speak to the hotel". Now this is where it gets interesting (I only found this all out after).

  • She goes to speak to the host, the host tells her that due to the fact she's given no notice she will still need to pay the flat rate for the room, which is kind of them as it's usually full price if less than 24hrs notice.

  • Cousin then goes to her mum and says she can't pay it, her mum goes to my mum and asks her to 'sort it' my mum tells her she can't do that, if she's not given notice then she needs to pay.

  • She goes back to the host and asks what happens if they don't pay - host informs her that if they don't pay the bride and groom will be charged.

  • Cousin then \\leaves the venue without paying and without saying goodbye!!\\ or even letting anyone know she still hasn't paid!!

  • When my husband and I check out in the morning we are told we now also need to cover the cost of her room - it was in our contract.

  • - - We obviously just do it, but we are upset as the cost has eaten into our pre- honeymoon hotel costs we now have to downgrade our 2 stays elsewhere this was a big deal for us as we both have children from previous relationships, so we had yet to spend any real time as just the two of us and we had budgeted to give ourselves a little treat.

  • The thing that irks me more than anything else is that at NO POINT has she called or text to apologise, there has been complete silence I find it beyond - rude that she knew we'd be charged but didn't bother to give anyone a heads up or even say she was sorry for dumping it on us.

  • The joke is the very same week she was posting pictures of taking her kids out on a special (and pricey) day out - which would easily have covered the room charge!

  • My family are all aware that we don't have much, that we both worked really hard and had to really save to treat ourselves, so it's not like she could have thought it would be fine for us to cover....and regardless you should still apologise!

  • A few of my family members say I should let it go, it's in the past, but frankly I don't want her at any parties or events I throw from now on so AITAH - here?!

  • Is it an AH thing to not want to be around someone like that?

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