27-year-old misses her 48-year-old dad's 4-year-old son's birthday party, fears she's not putting enough effort into their brother-sister relationship

2 months ago 21

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  • Happy sister and brother having fun time during birthday party in the kitchen

    A little boy is excited to blow out the candles at his 4th birthday party, despite the fact that his older sister is not here to celebrate with him.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The older sister was supposed to go to her younger brother's arcade birthday party, but she skipped at the last minute. While she planned to celebrate his birthday with in on the actual date, she questioned whether it was wrong of her to skip the party after initially RSVPing.

  • Am I the bad guy because I missed my 4-year-old brother's birthday party

    I'm a 27yr female, and my 48yr father has a 4yr old son. He had an arcade game birthday party 2-4pm today.

  • Boy plays basketball arcade game

    A little boy shoots hoops at his friend's arcade birthday party.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I had an exam to write that the same day that ended at 1pm. The party location is about 20 mins from my home and it would have taken me about an hour to get myself together to go to the party and another 20 mins to stop at the store to buy a gift.

  • Long story short I wasn't feeling too good (physically) after the exam and decided to just stay home.

  • Sad, thoughtful, worried African American girl sits on sofa looking away

    A tired woman relaxes at home after finishing her exams.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • His actual birthday is tomorrow and I planned on dropping a gift off then. His mother called me shortly after the party to remind me that I missed the party... and I simply told her I called my bad and he didn't answer... so there's that.

  • AITAH for not putting in enough effort?

  • chez2202 You are 27. You don't need to go to a birthday party for a 4 year old at an arcade because your brother is much more interested in playing with his friends than you. It's actually better to visit him on his actual birthday and give him his gift then. He would have had lots of gifts from friends at the party, he didn't need your gift at the party. But there are 2 things that you could have done better. You could have actually put some thought into your brother's gift and bought it sooner

  • IIIMEAN Original Poster's Reply Wow great points... I spoke with her afterwards and I agree i definitely care!! But the communication on my end was cr_p

  • Fox-Possum-3429 You've known when his birthday is for four years. You had ample opportunity to buy a gift ahead of the party date. Poor planning on your behalf!

  • IIIMEAN Original Poster's Reply Agreed!

  • SuperGiGi 1016 Actually OP did not know the date of the party for 4 years. The actual birthday is tomorrow. The party was a couple days before the birthday. And OP had planned on going to see their brother OB his actual birthday. Universities do not plan exams, and assignments, around your families birthdays. Sometimes there truly is not enough time to go look for a gift. It's not always poor planning. It's called life. OPS studies are more important than a birthday party.

  • babbykale I can't speak to how you feel after the exam, however YTA for not calling your father's wife or leaving a text letting them know you weren't attending but would come by the next day.

  • IIIMEAN Original Poster's Reply Fair, I called my dad but no answer so I didn't get a chance to speak to him. Should have sent a text tho!

  • Fox-Possum-3429 OP knew when 4 yo birthday was. There was no need to shop on the day of the party. Plan to fail or fail to plan. OP can plan better. They just didn't want to.

  • IIIMEAN Original Poster's Reply This is a bar "plan to fail or fail to plan" and I definitely didn't plan that well.. lesson learned

  • FlounderBetter2204 Not at all. Your 4 year old half brother probably didn't notice and definitely won't remember. Just take him a present the next time you visit.

  • BlazingSunflowerland You needed to prioritize school. Go tomorrow, with a gift, and ask him to tell you all about his birthday party. Give him your undivided attention. Sit on the floor with him and play with his new toys with him. Let him take the lead in how you play. He will love the attention.

  • AcanthisittaPlus5047 Universities DON'T schedule exams around toddler's birthdays. This is called life and passing college is more important than a b-day! NTA

  • AwkwardGrl8996 Definitely not, your exams are important and you're planning to see him in his actual birthday. You didn't forget him, you focusing on your education. also it's not your fault your dad didn't answer your call.

  • ImAMorty777 NTA. He's 4. He won't care or remember.

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